Get Work Done Son! - 2. Support

This morning at 4 am, I was reminded of what the number 2 system means. Support. True Support.

The kid woke up, starting crying, and just didn't know what she wanted. She wanted to be held. That was for sure. However, she didn't want to sit. Then again, she didn't want to stand. Then, she didn't want to be held. During all of this up-and-down, I started to feel something. Weak.

Something was not right. Every movement brought more and more discomfort. The clamminess, sweating my trembling hands, trying to comfort my displeased child. My legs seized every time I stood. My head at times would spin. My heartbeat felt like it jumped from my chest. Everything pulsated in time, like a metronome, speeding faster and faster. Thump. Thump Thump. Thump Thump Thump. All the while, my kid whined to be fed. I would feed her and she would whine I wasn't holding it right. Then she didn't want to be fed, and instead wanted on the ground the play. Never seesing. Always going. Added to the mayhem my body was giving me. Telling me of worse to come. Til finally, I knew what was going to happen.

I began to salivate rapidly. Like I had just seen a water bottle since the first time in the desert, my body began to prepare for what was coming. I tried putting Cori in the swing and going to evacuate the contents of my stomach, which at that time where a half eaten peanut butter and jelly. (Apple. In case you were wondering.) She was not having any of it. She would not be put down. Like Neapolion at Waterloo, I knew who would ultimately win this fight, but he constant whining was a presence I could not ignore. I held her again, trying to satiate her appetite for human contact. Until it was too late. I could not wait any more.

What I was attempting to do was not wake my wife. She has had it rough lately, getting up with the kid in the mornings. She works at a school, so she has to be there early. If I work until 10, which I do in most cases, then she will be up with Cori til she sleeps around 9. After that, she typically will wind down until I get home, then go to sleep. She has to be up at 6:30 for work. Between those times, Cori might wake up twice or three times just to be held or fed. Since I work so late and get up early to watch Cori while Rebecca is at work, I tend to sleep through those nighttime tears. I had today off, so I wanted to make sure Becca got all the sleep she could today. That was not going to be the case.

At the last possible moment, I woke up Becca. Dropping the kid to her side with near a-word of excuse, I sprang to the bathroom. Before I reached my destination however, the process began.

When all was said and done, Becca was by my side holding Cori, who was still whining because of some god only knows reason. So, I lay there, on the cold bathroom floor. Shivering but burning up. I attempted to make my way to the couch and stay awake with Rebecca while she watched the kid. My very matronly wife did not allow. She did not protest when I left her to take a shower and go back to sleep.

I woke up to a coughing session over the baby monitor a few hours later. By that time, my fever must have broken. I felt better, however still not near 100 percent. Even as I write this, I am having a bit of a headache. I finished the sandwich and a bowl of cereal as well. I even received a text. From the wife, it reads: "I hope you feel better. I love you."

Support. That's the number 2 thing I need to help raise this child and get work done. Not just from my wife, but all of our family. My mother-in-law has been tremendously supportive. She will watch Cori, but also have us for dinner every now-and-again. Her sister will watch Cor. My mother, who lives in Ohio, is extremely supportive. She has no ability to just come over and eat or watch the kid for us while we go to work or what-not. What my mother lacks in proximity, she has given ten fold to emotional support, financial support, and resourceful help.

Of course, it's not just family. Friends and co-workers are integral to our circle. I have a group of people I call on to watch Cori for a few hours a week while my wife and I are at work. My wife will work from 7 in the morning until 3:30 in the afternoon. I tend to draw a 2 pm to 10 pm shift. For all intents and purposes, we only need about 2 hours of daycare at most 3 days a week. Even then, thanks to support from my workplace, we're practically looking at 3 hours a week. If you look at daycare for infants under 1 years of age, a full-time day care will cost upwards of $2,000 a month. ... I don't make that much. My wife and I combined make just over that. There is in NO WAY we can afford those costs. It is IMPERATIVE that we have this group of supporting cast members helping us out.

Family, friends, work. Without these groups of support, I could not imagine trying to rear my child. I give as much credit to single parents as I can. That is basically the hardest thing I could think of doing. There is no one there at 4 am. There is tag-teaming when it comes to getting household chores done. You have to just make it work.

It takes a community to raise a child. It takes support to get work done, Son!